Friday, November 12, 2010


The other day I was talking to someone. Out of no where, they asked a question about what we want in our next baby: gender, race, etc.

I get questions inquiring about specifics we want for our next baby all the time. And each question I just let roll of my back, and laugh to myself. I guess that people assume that since we have put in the time to get approved, completed the work, and are ready to have a baby, that we are basically reaching out for a baby to fall out of the sky, into our lap.

Not true.

I am not looking for any baby.
I am looking for my baby.

In the same way that I know that J, Hugh, and Walt were meant for my family, I know-- I KNOW -- there is another baby that belongs in my family. IN THAT EXACT SAME WAY.

And I want to find THAT baby.

This is best way I know how to explain it: When people decide to add a child to their family, they generally get pregnant and wait nine months. Like most people, those nine months are not always glamourous, and super fun: it is a. lot. of. work. But anyone would do it again, to get the miracle that is their child.


So, once you are in the hospital, and the baby is born, it's time to go home. YOU WANT TO TAK YOUR OWN BABY HOME. You don't want to take just any baby that is available at the hospital. But why not? You have put in the time. You are ready to be a parent. You want a baby! So why does it matter what baby you get? A baby is a baby. Does it really matter? Why not just take what you can get?

You would never dream of taking home another baby that was not yours.

And that my friends, is how I feel about adoption. We have not done all the work, simply to run home with the first kid we can get our hands on.

We want OUR baby.
And we will keep searching.

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Home visit.

Well, it's done.

Christine came to visit our humble abode (and car, actually) today. At the start of this whole process, the idea of someone coming over to inspect, essentially, not only our home, but our family life, was some what overwhelming. But once I realized it would be our own case worker (who has an invested interest in us---not just some random third party person) that would be doing the dirty deed, I felt much more calm about it. I didn't really think much of it after that point.

And then we moved two weeks later. Awesome.

I felt like we were still getting our own footing in our new place, boxes still full, figuring out what goes where, slightly chaotic, etc. I planned to get the place into shape the weekend before she was coming, and then not think about it again.

But then we went out of town all weekend.

So Monday morning I spent a good time running around town, trying to get things to put the house in order. This morning, things were just out of control! We had bought things, had to return things, and put other things together, rearrange things, and move things around. Oh, and ya know, clean. It was crazy.

Good thing it was Tuesday! The boys were at play group and preschool, and I worked my tail off until the second Christine knocked on the door.

And then it was done.

We have officially completed everything on our check list that we need to do.

Well, sort of.


Sigh. A lot.

Ya know, like find our baby.

Sigh. Again.

So, it's a funny thing to say: we are done.
When clearly, we have just scratched the surface.

However, instead of dreading about how much we really have left to do (ah, so much, and so daunting), today we choose to celebrate the fact that WE HAVE DONE ALL THAT WE CAN UP TO THIS POINT. It's a good feeling. Actually, a great feeling. I feel some weight lifted off my shoulders.

And that's all that we can ask of ourselves today.

We are NOT approved yet.
Our homestudy has already been written up, and we have been presented before the committee.
We have been "pre-approved", until the following things reach our case worker, and she pushes the magic button:
-1 more personal reference that she has not received yet
-Chris' doctor approval form (he has already seen the doctor, just needs the paper signed)
-And our 500 (or 6) fingerprints to come back clear (we had to get additional prints done, because we have lived in three states in the last five years. Beautiful.)

So, we are praying for speedy arrival of these last things, so we can get this show on the road.

Friday, November 5, 2010

Couple Interview.

Our case worker is a stallion.
We are "one of those" type of adoption applicants that has sort of flown through the steps, in order to get approved, which is awesome for us, but kind of hectic for our case worker. She has been working like crazy to complete our home study, and get us all approved, etc.
Oh, and she is getting married in TWO WEEKS.

She rocks.

So, our couple interview was today. We also completed our homework hours, and turned those in.
Done. And done.
We have our home visit on Tuesday, and that's it.

Our check list is getting smaller and smaller.

After next week, the last thing on our list is: FIND BABY.

Easy, right?